11 days late.
And what makes it even more annoying is that I’m meant to be on holiday relaxing but instead I’m worried about a period gone AWOL.
My whole family, minus Elfa, came on holiday which is good, so at least I’m not alone with my mother.
The weather here is nice. Not much else to say about that. I did go to a water park with my sister. We went on one water slide that was basically vertical. The drop was crazy and I wanted to back out but the safety guy pushed me in. I was shaking for at least an hour after. The adrenalin properly kicked in.
But back to my messed up menstrual cycle.
Since last Monday, I’ve been having one sided pressure/dull ache on the right side of my pelvis. It’s fine. It could just be the pill doing its damage. I think I could have a cyst now. Like the excess hormones just made my body go crazy. I just hope nothing in there is broken.
Or perhaps I’m pregnant. But I don’t think so because I can’t recall Telis and I ever messing up. Plus the pregnancy test said negative… So…
I’ll take another one when I return.
* * *
I cried the other night before I left for holiday. I just haven’t been feeling like myself and everything that I’d been holding in just came out. With the whole Kirkby situation I’d been so emotionally detached from it. But I just felt so sad on Thursday night. I felt sad about what he was going through. I felt sad that I fucked up at work. I felt sad that my body was failing me. I was just sad! And I cried. And Telis cried with me.
I feel OK now.
Telis is really pushing himself to lose weight I feel like it’s my fault. Like my comment made him go overboard. I just don’t want him to hurt himself.
I love him and I love the way he is. I got with him as he was so I don’t expect him to change. But as long as he’s doing it for himself and being safe about it then it’s fine.