I’m anxious. I don’t know why. Perhaps it’s because of my work situation or something else that I just can’t comprehend.
I had an interview at Company T yesterday. It was so unexpected I was actually left speechless. My hiring manager said that I’m in a very fortunate position, that I have valuable experience within a top tier company and I would be snapped up by the big players like that. He asked why I would apply to a middle-market company like Company T, that once you get out of the big leagues, it’s hard to get back in. He wants me to think about what it is that I want for my career, because I have the potential of becoming very rich.
That’s definitely not what is expected from any interview but I did appreciate his honesty and candidness, albeit surprising. I don’t mind moving to a smaller company, as long as there is progression and I am rewarded for my input.
All I know is that I can’t wait to get the fuck out of my current job.
Today Telis got a face microneedled. I’m not sure if I ever mentioned the scarring on his face in the past. Maybe I did, either way I suggested he see’s a specialist about it and after his consultancy with one, I put down a large amount of money for three sessions of the treatment.
I wasn’t expecting what I saw. I knew that the skin would be pierced by micro needles but he was in so much pain and his face was bleeding – I felt so bad to put him through that. I actually just want to cry. I hated seeing him like that and I blame myself.
He’s only do it because I asked him to and I love and appreciate him for that. He’s such a good guy. His face is all red now. All I can do it laugh at him but inside I”m sad.
But I don’t think that’s what my anxiety is about.
I don’t know… Maybe I just feel like a terrible person.
I’m sat here trying to work my feelings out. It almost certainly has nothing to do with how I feel about Telis. Maybe it is career related and I’m just worried or perhaps I feel selfish for what I’ve done to my boyfriend. Who know…?
Sleep.