I’m sad.
I paid down the reservation fee for a new room that I wanted to rent out and I found out today that it’s no longer available. I really liked the room. It was spacious, an en suite and reasonably priced. It’s not fair. I want my money back.
In fact, I’m in a bad mood now and feel more like a failure than anything. I usually average about 40 subscribers on YouTube a day but today, I’ve barely even managed 20. It’s around 4:30pm which means the day is basically over and I’d have ended the day homeless with only 20 new subscribers. This day better turn around for the better or I will cry.
But I know it’s going to be terrible because I have four evenings to start and finish two craft projects. Pressure. I’ve had so much time to work on the projects but I was so stressed by the progress I was making that I just had to take a break for a few days. Now I‘m going to start from scratch and work on designs that are straightforward to complete.
Stressed.
And sad.
On the up side, things with Igor and I are great again. I’m happy with him. He is a great guy.
But I’m so, so sad. Everything is just so saddening today. I just want to hide myself away and wallow in my sadness but I have things I need to be busy with or else, come Saturday, if I don’t complete them, I’ll be even sadder than sad.
And I’m poor! Fuck my sad life…