It’s Wednesday tomorrow!! Eeee!! He actually messaged me today. We chatted briefly, I told him I was going to tell him a story. Now I need to decide whether or not I want to actually tell him this story or abort mission and run away.
But how do I tell it? Where do I start? Do I give an introduction? A summary? An overview?
Perhaps I should save it for another day. I don’t know how ‘we’re destined to be together’ will sound. I think I won’t tell the story. Especially if he thinks I’m reading the coincidences all wrong. But knowing me, I’d probably tell him.
Actually, I’ll tell him in a way where I’m not perpetuating the idea of a forever with him but rather I’m simply analysing what happened from an outsider’s perspective.
I calculated that we’ve spent just over 20 hours with each other in total. That’s a lot of hours. It’s weird. Two weeks ago, I would never have thought I’d be involved with another guy. I’m still not sure about how I feel about everything. This isn’t something I wanted – the whole dating malarky. It caught me off guard. I didn’t even want to give him a chance but now that I am, I’m going to have fun with it. I’ll enjoy his company and get to know him.
I like the impact he’s having in my life. I’ve already learnt so much from him and I want to expand my knowledge even further. I like that there’s so much to discuss with him. It’s actually rewarding in a way.
He asked me today if I had thought about the customer needs for my clothing brand. I said, ‘I have the answer. The customer need is simple: acceptance. And that explains it all. The end!’ To which he replied, ‘We will build on that but actually well done, it’s brilliant.’ I’m laughing but for some reason I have tears in my eyes because he is so sweet! Firstly, he said we. Secondly, he still praised me for my answer despite it not being as elaborate as it could have been. And thirdly, he fucking said we! He’s really pushing me to think about my brand, I’m just being a lazy motherfucker.
But he said we!
Anyway, let’s not be getting ahead of ourselves here.
I want to quit my job and find something new. I’m ready. Fed up of that place. I need change. If I actually end up in a new job, 2018 truly will be the year of change: first house, first car, new job, new lover (potentially). It’ll be like a new life. Hopefully a good one.
I have a good feeling about everything. I don’t know. I feel like meeting Telis set something in motion. Something big is about to happen and I can feel it in my bones.
I came up with a theory last night. I’m so sleepy right now but the gist of it is: Jesus was a genetic fluke. Like how animals can perceive things that humans can’t, like different frequencies and colours, Jesus could view and influence the world on a molecular level. That’s how he performed his miracles. Perhaps his brain was able to understand something the average human brain couldn’t. To Jesus, this was akin to breathing because that’s how he saw existence, it was normal to him, but to the everyday man who couldn’t comprehend the magics Jesus was performing, it was a mystery.
Similarly, if the universe could create sentient beings such as humans, the universe itself could be sentient. If that’s the case, what’s to say that the universe isn’t God, a creation of humanity to explain the unexplainable.
I know these ideas probably aren’t new, but they’re something to think about.
If the whole universe is written in our DNA, that would imply that everything and everyone is connected, and hence something I do here in Deraland would affect something a million lightyears away because of quantum entanglement, where time and distance isn’t a thing and entangled particles can influence each other instantaneously despite being lightyears away from each other.
I want to pose these questions and theories to Telis and see what he thinks.